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Bar News - December 16, 2005 New Lawyers Committee: Networking—the Key to Widening Your Horizons By: Mary B. Sheffer
As we enter the holiday season, you will undoubtedly be invited to various open houses, cocktail parties, dinner parties and the like. All of these events are great places to meet new people, reconnect with old friends, and network with other professionals. Get ready to introduce yourself to new people and potentially new opportunities.
Here are some tips to help you get through the party where you know only one or two people. Let’s use a spouse’s office party for an example. Your first step is to start planning. You have a ready source of information about who is attending. Ask your spouse if he/she knows any employees who share a common interest of yours. Also ask about the other spouses and/or guests who will be attending. Try to remember the names of at least three people who have something in common with you. Think of them as your lifelines. You know that starting a conversation with them should be relatively easy – you can talk about your shared interest. For those people you meet that you don’t have something in common with, conversation starters can be as simple as, “Can you believe this weather we’re having?” or, “The food here is supposed to be exceptional. Have you tried the (insert an entrée or hors d’oeuvre name)?” The key is to get the conversation started. When in doubt you can always talk about the weather, the food, and the venue, but with some advance planning, you should have some other topics on hand, too. Try to stay up on the local news so that you can bring up what is happening in the area. Other ideas for conversation starters: how the person knows the host; sports, both local and national; movies; hobbies. Your goal is to try to keep the conversation going for a polite period of time. You should also practice your six- to nine-second speech about what you do for a living. This little speech will come in handy in many situations. For example, you meet someone who knows of you and they say something like, “Nice to meet you, Mary. I understand that you’re an attorney?” This is your opportunity to use your 6-9-second speech. “Yes, I’m working in Manchester at a small firm. Currently my practice area is ….” You get the idea - something short and to the point. Whenever someone asks you what you do for a living, don’t just say, “I’m an attorney.” Give them your short speech so they know just what type of law you practice. You’ll be amazed what people remember and you want them to remember your name and practice area for future reference. Be sure to bring your business cards. The conversation could quickly turn into one in which someone asks for advice or wants to refer someone to you. If this is the case, it is appropriate, and helpful, for you to hand out a business card. However, if the conversation doesn’t lend itself to more about your firm and practice, keep your cards in your pocket. You don’t want to be remembered as an obnoxious attorney who was only at the party to hand out cards. Another mistake to avoid is being on the lookout for who else is at the party. No one likes it when the person he or she is speaking to is constantly looking around to see who else is in the room. Pay attention to the speaker, see if you can add something to the conversation, and have a graceful exit line. How does one exit a conversation? A simple “It was nice speaking with you,” is sufficient, and then you may move away to speak with someone else. If you are in a large group, it is fine to slowly move away when someone else at the other side of the group is speaking. You can excuse yourself to freshen your drink. Another way to move on from a conversation is to bring the other person with you. For example, you might say, “I see Joe Smith, I think that you would enjoy him, let me introduce you.” That way you widen your group and either change the conversation or will have an easier time making a graceful exit. Networking is the art of conversation, not glad-handing. Be pleasant and be courteous. Remember to do some planning, practice your 6-9-second introductory speech and you’ll be ready to face any type of situation. If you would like further information about networking, I highly recommend two books by Susan RoAne: How to Work a Room and What Do I Say Next. Both are full of practical advice on how to survive and thrive in any type of social situation. Mary B. Sheffer, a member of the New Lawyers’ Committee, is Assistant Dean for Career Services at Franklin Pierce Law Center. She has been a member of the NH Bar since 1992.
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